Once upon a time, I wanted so badly to be in a band. Via my dental work at Case by a rockabilly-loving resident, I was hooked up with his prof's daughter who played the drums. They lived in a very nice house in Berea with a room off to the side full of amazing guitar gear and a four-track recorder.
We attempted all sorts of sounds and projects, and at that time I didn't know how to sing (ah the wonders of embracing the alto and learning to transpose to different keys since!) and we had a revolving door of acquaintances with which we played, often with varying results, some lasting longer than others because sometimes they really didn't know how to play and just wanted to say they were in a band or they were in bands with other people or whatever.
After the short-lived punk band in which I played bass and we quit before playing a show that wouldn't have happened anyway, there was a brief all-girl project that resulted in a cassette tape with some Bikini Kill covers and our attempt at sounding like a Kim Gordon-fronted Sonic Youth track. For all the feminist rhetoric of my bandmates, that soon also went down in flames as I really don't like Bikini Kill and wanted to play something with more than four chords, and one of the other girls started dating some guy because most of the uber-feminist-I-don't-need-a-man girls usually end up doing. For those of us who prefer the company of the male species but always seem to end up being the platonic homie, this is frustrating in its irony but that's a whole other post.
I have not played these tapes for anyone for obvious reasons. After that, my drummer friend got sick of all this and went off to an Ivy League college and out of all my former bandmates, I'm still in touch with only one, incidentally the one who took the band breakup the hardest.
Ten years later, I'm driving back to Berea and getting utterly lost. I've been itching to play music in a more noise-making capacity for awhile now, so thanks to the strange connections made over fiber optic cables and a shred of musical commonality, I'm plugging my guitar in, tweaking the tone knobs on the amplifier and my distortion pedal as we try to find some common ground between my absurd college radio eclecticism and ultimate corporate rock tendencies that mesh well with the 90's rocking of the rhythm section and I wonder what the singer who's a few years younger than us and got the whole thing started thinks since none of us are really metalheads or at least that's not the style we play or it's not always that kind of metal.
We settle on the Cure and on Joy Division's 'Love Will Tear Us Apart' because it's something everyone knows, and while my fingers are used to strumming from doing church music and bluegrass, I find that all those years of noodling on my dad's Gretsch in the basement haven't been for naught, as my fingers loosen and I have the back of bass and drums and rhythm guitar courtesy of the girl who just arrived.
I'm tremolo-picking on the upper frets and noodling through pentatonics, bending strings and sustaining notes with the whammy bar and letting the tremolo from my ancient amp reverberate like crush with eyeliner. While the others take a break, me and the bassist mess around with songs that we grew up hearing on the radio but turning them into something more feminine and melancholic and find that our voices harmonize well.
I wonder what this may or may not coalesce into, because there are so many dynamics and so many unknowns and so many ways in which tastes converge and also don't. I don't understand the love of Kittie when there are infinitely better and more interesting women making music. I still don't know how one gets through 20+ years in American subcultural life without ever hearing a song by Nirvana or Alice in Chains, or maybe I'm just more irrelevant than I first thought. It's highly possible.
I'm pondering the infinite strands of subculture and taste beneath the all-encompassing tag or rock and or roll. I have the certain sounds I like, and the things I play, and while I can break out of that, it's still where I ultimately come back to. I want to play songs that would move me if it wasn't me.
I love melodic vocals and strange harmonies, glorious layers of distortion, sinuous basslines and insistent drums. I love guitars that shimmer, crunch, and cry. I'm feeling old and past the point of wanting to make it good, and for now, I will play well with others, and see what comes.
All I know is that I still want to be Kristin Hersh when I grow up.
Showing posts with label suburbia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label suburbia. Show all posts
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
best of the blotter: Tiki Torches, Trashed Teletubbies, and Vicious Chihuahuas
ARSON, SHELDON ROAD: Someone at 2:30 a.m. Oct. 22 set off a tiki torch fuel can inside a traffic cone and put it on top of a trunk lid of a Chevrolet parked in the lot by Arcadian Lake Apartments at 2:30 a.m.
There are no suspects.
OVI, COLUMBIA ROAD: Police stopped a car on Columbia Road near Lake Road Oct. 23 at 1:52 a.m. after the driver nearly caused an accident, according to police. An officer suspected the 27-year-old man — who was dressed like Tinky Winky, a character on the children’s TV show “Teletubbies” — had been drinking. The driver said he was coming from a Halloween costume party in North Olmsted and admitted to drinking beer, police said. After an officer administered field sobriety tests, the driver was arrested for operating a vehicle while impaired. He will face charges in Rocky River Municipal Court.
WELFARE CHECK, PROSPECT ROAD: Police received word of an elderly man slumped over in his vehicle at 10 p.m. Oct. 23.
Accordion music was playing inside the vehicle and when a passerby called out to him, the man did not react.
When an officer arrived, it was learned that the man had simply fallen asleep after an exhausting day. The officer followed him home, ensuring his safety.
STRONGSVILLE
A 40-year-old Bluffside Street man called police at 3 a.m. Friday to say he'd been assaulted in a bar, but then thought the officer who arrived was a taxi to take him to get some food.
The man told police an officer had already given him a ride home.
Police determined the man had been drinking at the Islander in Middleburg Heights and that police in that city had driven him home.
BEACHWOOD
Week-long Chihuahua chase ends in groundhog trap
Sunday, Oct. 9, 10:20 a.m. — A puppy got stuck in a cage that was set to catch a groundhog in Baywood Estates. The police report noted that it was a mean Chihuahua they have been trying to catch for a week. The animal warden responded and took the animal.
There are no suspects.
OVI, COLUMBIA ROAD: Police stopped a car on Columbia Road near Lake Road Oct. 23 at 1:52 a.m. after the driver nearly caused an accident, according to police. An officer suspected the 27-year-old man — who was dressed like Tinky Winky, a character on the children’s TV show “Teletubbies” — had been drinking. The driver said he was coming from a Halloween costume party in North Olmsted and admitted to drinking beer, police said. After an officer administered field sobriety tests, the driver was arrested for operating a vehicle while impaired. He will face charges in Rocky River Municipal Court.
WELFARE CHECK, PROSPECT ROAD: Police received word of an elderly man slumped over in his vehicle at 10 p.m. Oct. 23.
Accordion music was playing inside the vehicle and when a passerby called out to him, the man did not react.
When an officer arrived, it was learned that the man had simply fallen asleep after an exhausting day. The officer followed him home, ensuring his safety.
STRONGSVILLE
A 40-year-old Bluffside Street man called police at 3 a.m. Friday to say he'd been assaulted in a bar, but then thought the officer who arrived was a taxi to take him to get some food.
The man told police an officer had already given him a ride home.
Police determined the man had been drinking at the Islander in Middleburg Heights and that police in that city had driven him home.
BEACHWOOD
Week-long Chihuahua chase ends in groundhog trap
Sunday, Oct. 9, 10:20 a.m. — A puppy got stuck in a cage that was set to catch a groundhog in Baywood Estates. The police report noted that it was a mean Chihuahua they have been trying to catch for a week. The animal warden responded and took the animal.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
best of the blotter: gum, guns, drugs, and turtles
DISORDERLY CONDUCT,
CHRISTOPHER DRIVE: During the evening of Aug. 29, a resident reported an older man pointing a rifle at the complainant, his wife, and his dog while they were walking by.
The resident asked the man with the rifle if it was loaded, after observing the red laser coming from it.
The elderly man with the rifle told them he was just aligning his laser on his .308 rifle and need a long distance to do it.
He told the officer he detached the laser and waved it across the street, a story with which the complainant disagreed.
The man with the rifle was issued a citation for disorderly conduct.
NOISE COMPLAINT, NORTH STREET: Police responded shortly after 10 p.m. on Sept. 3 to a report of “very loud and scary music that sounds like it’s coming from Waterfall Trail or Twin Lakes Trail.” Police tracked the commotion to Waterfall Trail, where the revelers were advised to turn the sound down and disband the party at 11 p.m.
DISTURBANCE, EAST WASHINGTON STREET: A clerk at the BP Station reported Sept. 3 that a woman and her daughter had been in the station making a purchase and that she then accused him of throwing her change back at her. “The clerk countered that he had accidentally dropped a dime on the floor. The clerk said a witness backed his story up that “he did not throw coins at the delusional, out of control customer.”
DISTURBANCE, RIDGEBURY BOULEVARD: Police responded Sept. 1 to a report of a boy stepping out in front of passing motorists on the street and blowing his trumpet. Officers advised the boy to put his trumpet away and march on.
VANDALISM, NORTH INDUSTRIAL PARKWAY: Representatives from Digestive Disease reported a second-floor window of their building shattered some time between 5:20 p.m. Sept. 1 and 8:20 a.m. Sept. 2. Police had no suspects or damage estimates at the time of the report.
SNAPPING TURTLE, SPRINGBROOK: A large snapping turtle was loitering in the parking lot of a Springbrook Drive apartment complex around 7:30 p.m., Aug. 28. A concerned resident told police that the turtle could be injured or could injure somebody else. An officer responded and escorted the turtle into a nearby creek. The turtle readily entered the water.
BEREA
COMPLICITY, SPRAGUE ROAD: Police arrested a 31-year-old store clerk after he gave money to one of two youngsters to steal a sign.
A resident who put up a handmade sign urging people not to shop at a nearby store saw a boy on a bike Aug. 27 take the sign and leave. The report said the man has had an ongoing problem with his signs disappearing from his yard.
Police found two boys at the store, one of whom was described as the culprit. The 13-year-old said the clerk gave him $11 to steal the sign. The boy also told police he was offer $20 to egg the house and shout obscenities at the resident. The boy gave police a $1 and $10 bill from his pocket.
The clerk said he had “international” lawyers and the case would be dismissed if he did give the boy the money. He also said he had a “billion dollar” family and that “We run America,” according to the police report.
The Rocky River man was cited for complicity regarding the theft since he caused an irresponsible person to commit an offense.
SCARY MOVIE, WARREN ROAD: Someone called police just after midnight on Aug. 19 out of concern for their neighbor. The caller told police they heard arguing and a female screaming for help. Police responded, but found all the drama was for naught. Apparently, the neighbors were just watching a scary movie and the volume was a little high.
DISTURBANCE, WHTNEY ROAD: An anonymous caller reported that it sounded like someone was shooting a gun in the neighborhood around 10:30 p.m. Aug. 20.
Officers arrived at the scene and spoke with several people, though no one else heard or saw anything resembling the report.
The noise was later identified when officers discovered a resident on the fifth floor of an apartment complex dropping bags of clothing off his balcony. That resident explained that dropping the clothes to the ground was easier than taking them down in the elevator.
Not Much Fun on Party Bus
Police found an unoccupied party bus marked "Rock It Cleveland" pulled over on Sprague Road near Pearl Road about 5 a.m. Aug. 28.
There was no sign of the partiers. Officers called the number on the bus, but the person who answered said he did not know why the vehicle was there.
He promised to have it moved shortly.
Suspicious Bag
A caller didn't like the looks of a large red bag sitting on the side of the road at Royalton and Prospect Aug. 26.
Police found the bag had an address on it and was advertising a garage sale.
An alarm brought police to Twilight Boutique, 11025 Prospect Rd., just before midnight Sunday.
Officers found the glass broken and some products, including herbal incense, missing.
In addition, the cash register had been picked up, but was left behind.
The product sold at the store is marketed as incense, but is often rolled into cigarettes and smoked by teens and young adults for what they call a "legal high."
The leafy material in the packets is treated with chemicals that produce a marijuana-like high when smoked, authorities say.
DRUG NOTE, NORTHLAND: A Northland Drive woman returned home on Aug. 19 around 10:50 p.m., and found out that one of her neighbors had given her 12-year-old brother a note asking if the woman would sell the neighbor marijuana or pills. The woman filed a report with police, but no arrests have been made.
THEFT, GIRARD DRIVE: About $130 worth of chewing gun was stolen overnight Aug. 26 from a car in the 400 block. The owner of the car is a sales representative for the company that makes gum. The thief did not take a wallet or a backpack that the owner found outside his car.
CHRISTOPHER DRIVE: During the evening of Aug. 29, a resident reported an older man pointing a rifle at the complainant, his wife, and his dog while they were walking by.
The resident asked the man with the rifle if it was loaded, after observing the red laser coming from it.
The elderly man with the rifle told them he was just aligning his laser on his .308 rifle and need a long distance to do it.
He told the officer he detached the laser and waved it across the street, a story with which the complainant disagreed.
The man with the rifle was issued a citation for disorderly conduct.
NOISE COMPLAINT, NORTH STREET: Police responded shortly after 10 p.m. on Sept. 3 to a report of “very loud and scary music that sounds like it’s coming from Waterfall Trail or Twin Lakes Trail.” Police tracked the commotion to Waterfall Trail, where the revelers were advised to turn the sound down and disband the party at 11 p.m.
DISTURBANCE, EAST WASHINGTON STREET: A clerk at the BP Station reported Sept. 3 that a woman and her daughter had been in the station making a purchase and that she then accused him of throwing her change back at her. “The clerk countered that he had accidentally dropped a dime on the floor. The clerk said a witness backed his story up that “he did not throw coins at the delusional, out of control customer.”
DISTURBANCE, RIDGEBURY BOULEVARD: Police responded Sept. 1 to a report of a boy stepping out in front of passing motorists on the street and blowing his trumpet. Officers advised the boy to put his trumpet away and march on.
VANDALISM, NORTH INDUSTRIAL PARKWAY: Representatives from Digestive Disease reported a second-floor window of their building shattered some time between 5:20 p.m. Sept. 1 and 8:20 a.m. Sept. 2. Police had no suspects or damage estimates at the time of the report.
SNAPPING TURTLE, SPRINGBROOK: A large snapping turtle was loitering in the parking lot of a Springbrook Drive apartment complex around 7:30 p.m., Aug. 28. A concerned resident told police that the turtle could be injured or could injure somebody else. An officer responded and escorted the turtle into a nearby creek. The turtle readily entered the water.
BEREA
COMPLICITY, SPRAGUE ROAD: Police arrested a 31-year-old store clerk after he gave money to one of two youngsters to steal a sign.
A resident who put up a handmade sign urging people not to shop at a nearby store saw a boy on a bike Aug. 27 take the sign and leave. The report said the man has had an ongoing problem with his signs disappearing from his yard.
Police found two boys at the store, one of whom was described as the culprit. The 13-year-old said the clerk gave him $11 to steal the sign. The boy also told police he was offer $20 to egg the house and shout obscenities at the resident. The boy gave police a $1 and $10 bill from his pocket.
The clerk said he had “international” lawyers and the case would be dismissed if he did give the boy the money. He also said he had a “billion dollar” family and that “We run America,” according to the police report.
The Rocky River man was cited for complicity regarding the theft since he caused an irresponsible person to commit an offense.
SCARY MOVIE, WARREN ROAD: Someone called police just after midnight on Aug. 19 out of concern for their neighbor. The caller told police they heard arguing and a female screaming for help. Police responded, but found all the drama was for naught. Apparently, the neighbors were just watching a scary movie and the volume was a little high.
DISTURBANCE, WHTNEY ROAD: An anonymous caller reported that it sounded like someone was shooting a gun in the neighborhood around 10:30 p.m. Aug. 20.
Officers arrived at the scene and spoke with several people, though no one else heard or saw anything resembling the report.
The noise was later identified when officers discovered a resident on the fifth floor of an apartment complex dropping bags of clothing off his balcony. That resident explained that dropping the clothes to the ground was easier than taking them down in the elevator.
Not Much Fun on Party Bus
Police found an unoccupied party bus marked "Rock It Cleveland" pulled over on Sprague Road near Pearl Road about 5 a.m. Aug. 28.
There was no sign of the partiers. Officers called the number on the bus, but the person who answered said he did not know why the vehicle was there.
He promised to have it moved shortly.
Suspicious Bag
A caller didn't like the looks of a large red bag sitting on the side of the road at Royalton and Prospect Aug. 26.
Police found the bag had an address on it and was advertising a garage sale.
An alarm brought police to Twilight Boutique, 11025 Prospect Rd., just before midnight Sunday.
Officers found the glass broken and some products, including herbal incense, missing.
In addition, the cash register had been picked up, but was left behind.
The product sold at the store is marketed as incense, but is often rolled into cigarettes and smoked by teens and young adults for what they call a "legal high."
The leafy material in the packets is treated with chemicals that produce a marijuana-like high when smoked, authorities say.
DRUG NOTE, NORTHLAND: A Northland Drive woman returned home on Aug. 19 around 10:50 p.m., and found out that one of her neighbors had given her 12-year-old brother a note asking if the woman would sell the neighbor marijuana or pills. The woman filed a report with police, but no arrests have been made.
THEFT, GIRARD DRIVE: About $130 worth of chewing gun was stolen overnight Aug. 26 from a car in the 400 block. The owner of the car is a sales representative for the company that makes gum. The thief did not take a wallet or a backpack that the owner found outside his car.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
paper scraps and paper chase
Being Peonage of the Towering Slab of Ivory, I hear a lot of people talk about their degrees, the degrees they want, the degrees that someone else has or doesn't, and there is some degree of cultural capital in certain circles where you're validated by how many letters are after your name or where you went to school, what you studied, and how far you went, where you got published, what conference you presented at, who you know.
And then there is the vicious cycle of a cramped job market, where everyone has the same credentials but possibly more experience or better connections, where you don't get called back because you don't have some piece of paper, or if you have too many pieces. I only got my gig of relative underemployment due to not graduating in time and learning the hard way after not getting called back for looking too overqualified or for having the right credentials but not the 20 years of experience that belonged to others. In Proverbs, it's said to be wise is to ask God for neither poverty nor riches and that's what I did, and that's what I got. While the interpersonals can get complicated, it's truly everywhere.
My peers defer adulthood and keep taking out more loans, to find out that they've screwed themselves over because that golden ticket never did materialize. Most of my fellow grad-schoolers pursued other dreams instead or held out for that Really Good Job because they considered themselves too good to do what I do. I've got free tuition and really good health insurance and a couple good coworker homies, which makes up for the lack of pay most of the time, but to think that one is entitled based on having such and such a degree or two, when there's little work ethic and even less decency towards others, starts seeming absurd.
Self-perpetuation of those already entrenched, ageism of the you're too old or you're so young, the stress of maintaining image and lifestyle, of making a good impression and paying the mortgage while the domestic life disintegrates. Maybe this is why people like Jonathan Franzen novels and Desperate Housewives. At least someone's suburban misery is worse.
Suburban desperation has long been a cultural trope and one I've found ridiculous and overwrought, but I've never existed in the world of the super-suburbs, just the working-class one where the people in my life who went to college ended up being truck drivers or stay-at-home moms who used their brains to help us use ours, so I've never truly understood this, and living in the city means that I see less of it, so when I do, it stands out intensely.
And as education becomes more to do with becoming good little cogs with culturally appropriate opinions, and higher education a lucrative enterprise that's bought into with the expectation of economic payoff, of higher wages and greater prestige, more people have bought in and it's gotten more cramped, and I watch more and more people reduced tears and bitterness because the system they paid so much into is not producing the returns that were expected.
And then the people who do have the qualifications who got where they were more or less by accident of birth, of getting in while the getting was good back when there were times of relative economic prosperity, when degrees and diplomas meant more, look down on everyone else who is not so lucky.
These are things that I don't deal with as much, only observe. I hover in social limbo between suburbanites and those that have little to nothing. I can't say that I've dropped out of this system, but I've left the rat racing to others, but I see it all around me and sometimes I wish I was doing a little bit better so maybe I could travel somewhere outside the United States just once, or maybe not live upstairs from someone, and realize that there's still residue of these American dreams that have fueled all sorts of bad things. We've all got our struggles, and those of us who preferred learning for the sake of learning and art for the sake of art are the ones living paycheck to paycheck, but I still feel like I made the better trade.
And then there is the vicious cycle of a cramped job market, where everyone has the same credentials but possibly more experience or better connections, where you don't get called back because you don't have some piece of paper, or if you have too many pieces. I only got my gig of relative underemployment due to not graduating in time and learning the hard way after not getting called back for looking too overqualified or for having the right credentials but not the 20 years of experience that belonged to others. In Proverbs, it's said to be wise is to ask God for neither poverty nor riches and that's what I did, and that's what I got. While the interpersonals can get complicated, it's truly everywhere.
My peers defer adulthood and keep taking out more loans, to find out that they've screwed themselves over because that golden ticket never did materialize. Most of my fellow grad-schoolers pursued other dreams instead or held out for that Really Good Job because they considered themselves too good to do what I do. I've got free tuition and really good health insurance and a couple good coworker homies, which makes up for the lack of pay most of the time, but to think that one is entitled based on having such and such a degree or two, when there's little work ethic and even less decency towards others, starts seeming absurd.
Self-perpetuation of those already entrenched, ageism of the you're too old or you're so young, the stress of maintaining image and lifestyle, of making a good impression and paying the mortgage while the domestic life disintegrates. Maybe this is why people like Jonathan Franzen novels and Desperate Housewives. At least someone's suburban misery is worse.
Suburban desperation has long been a cultural trope and one I've found ridiculous and overwrought, but I've never existed in the world of the super-suburbs, just the working-class one where the people in my life who went to college ended up being truck drivers or stay-at-home moms who used their brains to help us use ours, so I've never truly understood this, and living in the city means that I see less of it, so when I do, it stands out intensely.
And as education becomes more to do with becoming good little cogs with culturally appropriate opinions, and higher education a lucrative enterprise that's bought into with the expectation of economic payoff, of higher wages and greater prestige, more people have bought in and it's gotten more cramped, and I watch more and more people reduced tears and bitterness because the system they paid so much into is not producing the returns that were expected.
And then the people who do have the qualifications who got where they were more or less by accident of birth, of getting in while the getting was good back when there were times of relative economic prosperity, when degrees and diplomas meant more, look down on everyone else who is not so lucky.
These are things that I don't deal with as much, only observe. I hover in social limbo between suburbanites and those that have little to nothing. I can't say that I've dropped out of this system, but I've left the rat racing to others, but I see it all around me and sometimes I wish I was doing a little bit better so maybe I could travel somewhere outside the United States just once, or maybe not live upstairs from someone, and realize that there's still residue of these American dreams that have fueled all sorts of bad things. We've all got our struggles, and those of us who preferred learning for the sake of learning and art for the sake of art are the ones living paycheck to paycheck, but I still feel like I made the better trade.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
best of the blotter: hootenanies, stoners, and strange fireballs
AVON:
SUSPICIOUS CONDITION, SCHWARTZ ROAD: Police received a report on Aug. 6 from a nearby resident about two carloads of “illegal immigrants” at the east end of the park who were changing clothes in plain sight, acting in an intimidating manner and who the caller thought were preparing to have some kind of “hootenanny.” Police arrived on the scene to find the suspects were preparing to play a soccer game. They were advised about changing in plain sight.
CHAGRIN FALLS
CRIMINAL MISCHIEF, SHOPPING PLAZA: A worker with the Village Service Department reported at daybreak on Aug. 11 that there was “extensive graffiti on the walls and pavement at the shopping center.” But officials soon discovered that everything had been done in chalk, including peace signs, as well as recommendations to “recycle” and “thaw out.” There was also at least one body outline in chalk on the pavement, as well as a door drawn to the “Chalk Zone.” A hose quickly dispatched all of the handiwork of the temporary taggers.
SOLON
WARRANT/UNLAWFUL RESTRAINT, AURORA ROAD: A warrant was issued Aug. 10 for a Solon man, 52, following an incident four days earlier in the checkout line at the Solar Center Giant Eagle, where a man unknown to a cashier, 19, became “flirtatious“ with her, saying he wanted to take her to Las Vegas with him.
He then took some time to direct racial comments at a customer behind him in line, then put his arms around the cashier and kissed her on the neck. She told him she couldn’t go with him because she would get fired, but when she reached back to get a carton of eggs he had apparently left behind, he attempted to physically pick her up, telling her “My jets are waiting.”
Then he was gone, but these tender moments were preserved on in-store security cameras, which led to the man’s identity being detected and the warrant being issued. As of Aug. 16, the suspect had yet to turn himself in.
OVI/POSSESSION OF MARIJUANA (MEDICINAL); U.S. ALT. 422: When police pulled over a Los Angeles woman, 29, for driving westbound at 81 mph on the 60-mph freeway just after 8:30 p.m. on Aug. 13, she was detained for suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol, but she kept asking about her marijuana, saying she wanted it back.
What police found was a container of Jolly Ranchers candy with a label that said “Contains Cannabis — For Medical Use Only.” The Jolly Ranchers were confiscated although the woman claimed she had a prescription for them, which police said they were still waiting to see before releasing them to her.
The woman registered a .067 BAC on the Breathalyzer, which is below the legal limit of .08, although the charges against her still allege she was impaired.
MARIJUANA, N. COURT STREET: A 24-year-old Medina man was pulled over at Taco Bell, on North Court Street, for driving without headlights at 2:23 a.m. Aug. 6.
Upon further investigation, police discovered that the man was driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol and was also allegedly in possession of marijuana. He was arrested and charged.
MARIJUANA PLANTS FOUND, WHITEHALL DRIVE: A 4-foot-tall marijuana plant was found Aug. 8 in the rear of a house in the first block of Whitehall, next to a house in the 500 block of Prospect Street. The owner of the house said the plant was not his and might be a prank by neighbors.
HARASSMENT, SONTEY POINT DRIVE: An anonymous resident left a letter in a caller’s mailbox regarding the condition of the caller’s house on Aug. 11.
The caller explained that the letter, which had been typed, derided the condition of the caller’s house. The author of the letter hinted at the fact that he or she was trying to sell his or her own house. The author also explained that he or she does not like the caller’s blue shutters or the blue tarp that is used along the back patio.
The caller was advised that this is not a criminal act, but that it is rude.
DISORDERLY CONDUCT, FAIRGROUNDS: Police on Aug. 13 arrested a 29-year-old North Olmsted man during a concert at the county fairgrounds. Police took the man from the grandstands because he would not obey orders to leave the grandstands, where he had flicked a cigarette into a person’s hand.
While being arrested, the man told police he wanted to wear his hat because it was “a space helmet used for time travel.” The man also told police he was Jesus.
SPOILED SUNSET, PARKING DECK: Police found a juvenile girl sitting in the top-level corner of the parking deck on E. Liberty Street, around 9:15 p.m. Aug. 1. The girl said she was listening to music and watching the sunset. Officers, who thought she may have run away from home, called her parents and they came and picked her up.
FISHY SITUATION, RETREAT DRIVE: A 58-year-old man reported that someone left two bags of dead fish on the front lawn of his property.
One of the bags had a note attached to it, which read: “Clean up your lake.”
The assumption is that this action is related to ongoing negotiations between the homeowners association and Burgundy Bay — a neighborhood located across the lake to the west of Retreat Drive. The resident suspects that the person who did this is an opponent of the merger.
No further evidence was available.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, ABIGAIL LANE: In the late hours of Aug. 6, an anonymous caller reported a very loud party taking place at a residence on the street. The caller said that the people were shooting “strange fireballs” into the air and that the whole situation seemed very unsafe.
An officer arrived at the scene and spoke with someone at the residence in question. The resident explained that he and his family and friends were having a graduation party and that they had shot off a few fireworks. He told the officer that the party would be going inside for the night.
WADSWORTH ROAD: A pink battery-powered Barbie jeep was stolen from a Wadsworth Road residence between 9 p.m., Aug. 8, and 8:30 a.m., Aug. 9.
The jeep was in the backyard during the time of the theft. The value of the jeep was not known. Police have not identified any suspects.
SPRAY PAINT, S. BROADWAY STREET: Assailants used silver spray paint to damage several properties along South Broadway Street on Aug. 9.
The suspects spray painted the taillights and trunk of a car, which was parked in the 600 block of South Broadway.
The assailants also wrote “SAINTS” on a tree in the yard. Down the road, another vehicle was spray painted on the passenger side. On the corner of Broadway and Grant streets, police also found silver spray paint on a street sign, fire hydrant and the pavement.
The suspects had again written “SAINTS,“ this time on the road in the 100 block of Grant. Two other South Broadway residents reported spray paint damage to outdoor signs at their homes. No arrests have been made.
SUSPICIOUS CONDITION, SCHWARTZ ROAD: Police received a report on Aug. 6 from a nearby resident about two carloads of “illegal immigrants” at the east end of the park who were changing clothes in plain sight, acting in an intimidating manner and who the caller thought were preparing to have some kind of “hootenanny.” Police arrived on the scene to find the suspects were preparing to play a soccer game. They were advised about changing in plain sight.
CHAGRIN FALLS
CRIMINAL MISCHIEF, SHOPPING PLAZA: A worker with the Village Service Department reported at daybreak on Aug. 11 that there was “extensive graffiti on the walls and pavement at the shopping center.” But officials soon discovered that everything had been done in chalk, including peace signs, as well as recommendations to “recycle” and “thaw out.” There was also at least one body outline in chalk on the pavement, as well as a door drawn to the “Chalk Zone.” A hose quickly dispatched all of the handiwork of the temporary taggers.
SOLON
WARRANT/UNLAWFUL RESTRAINT, AURORA ROAD: A warrant was issued Aug. 10 for a Solon man, 52, following an incident four days earlier in the checkout line at the Solar Center Giant Eagle, where a man unknown to a cashier, 19, became “flirtatious“ with her, saying he wanted to take her to Las Vegas with him.
He then took some time to direct racial comments at a customer behind him in line, then put his arms around the cashier and kissed her on the neck. She told him she couldn’t go with him because she would get fired, but when she reached back to get a carton of eggs he had apparently left behind, he attempted to physically pick her up, telling her “My jets are waiting.”
Then he was gone, but these tender moments were preserved on in-store security cameras, which led to the man’s identity being detected and the warrant being issued. As of Aug. 16, the suspect had yet to turn himself in.
OVI/POSSESSION OF MARIJUANA (MEDICINAL); U.S. ALT. 422: When police pulled over a Los Angeles woman, 29, for driving westbound at 81 mph on the 60-mph freeway just after 8:30 p.m. on Aug. 13, she was detained for suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol, but she kept asking about her marijuana, saying she wanted it back.
What police found was a container of Jolly Ranchers candy with a label that said “Contains Cannabis — For Medical Use Only.” The Jolly Ranchers were confiscated although the woman claimed she had a prescription for them, which police said they were still waiting to see before releasing them to her.
The woman registered a .067 BAC on the Breathalyzer, which is below the legal limit of .08, although the charges against her still allege she was impaired.
MARIJUANA, N. COURT STREET: A 24-year-old Medina man was pulled over at Taco Bell, on North Court Street, for driving without headlights at 2:23 a.m. Aug. 6.
Upon further investigation, police discovered that the man was driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol and was also allegedly in possession of marijuana. He was arrested and charged.
MARIJUANA PLANTS FOUND, WHITEHALL DRIVE: A 4-foot-tall marijuana plant was found Aug. 8 in the rear of a house in the first block of Whitehall, next to a house in the 500 block of Prospect Street. The owner of the house said the plant was not his and might be a prank by neighbors.
HARASSMENT, SONTEY POINT DRIVE: An anonymous resident left a letter in a caller’s mailbox regarding the condition of the caller’s house on Aug. 11.
The caller explained that the letter, which had been typed, derided the condition of the caller’s house. The author of the letter hinted at the fact that he or she was trying to sell his or her own house. The author also explained that he or she does not like the caller’s blue shutters or the blue tarp that is used along the back patio.
The caller was advised that this is not a criminal act, but that it is rude.
DISORDERLY CONDUCT, FAIRGROUNDS: Police on Aug. 13 arrested a 29-year-old North Olmsted man during a concert at the county fairgrounds. Police took the man from the grandstands because he would not obey orders to leave the grandstands, where he had flicked a cigarette into a person’s hand.
While being arrested, the man told police he wanted to wear his hat because it was “a space helmet used for time travel.” The man also told police he was Jesus.
SPOILED SUNSET, PARKING DECK: Police found a juvenile girl sitting in the top-level corner of the parking deck on E. Liberty Street, around 9:15 p.m. Aug. 1. The girl said she was listening to music and watching the sunset. Officers, who thought she may have run away from home, called her parents and they came and picked her up.
FISHY SITUATION, RETREAT DRIVE: A 58-year-old man reported that someone left two bags of dead fish on the front lawn of his property.
One of the bags had a note attached to it, which read: “Clean up your lake.”
The assumption is that this action is related to ongoing negotiations between the homeowners association and Burgundy Bay — a neighborhood located across the lake to the west of Retreat Drive. The resident suspects that the person who did this is an opponent of the merger.
No further evidence was available.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, ABIGAIL LANE: In the late hours of Aug. 6, an anonymous caller reported a very loud party taking place at a residence on the street. The caller said that the people were shooting “strange fireballs” into the air and that the whole situation seemed very unsafe.
An officer arrived at the scene and spoke with someone at the residence in question. The resident explained that he and his family and friends were having a graduation party and that they had shot off a few fireworks. He told the officer that the party would be going inside for the night.
WADSWORTH ROAD: A pink battery-powered Barbie jeep was stolen from a Wadsworth Road residence between 9 p.m., Aug. 8, and 8:30 a.m., Aug. 9.
The jeep was in the backyard during the time of the theft. The value of the jeep was not known. Police have not identified any suspects.
SPRAY PAINT, S. BROADWAY STREET: Assailants used silver spray paint to damage several properties along South Broadway Street on Aug. 9.
The suspects spray painted the taillights and trunk of a car, which was parked in the 600 block of South Broadway.
The assailants also wrote “SAINTS” on a tree in the yard. Down the road, another vehicle was spray painted on the passenger side. On the corner of Broadway and Grant streets, police also found silver spray paint on a street sign, fire hydrant and the pavement.
The suspects had again written “SAINTS,“ this time on the road in the 100 block of Grant. Two other South Broadway residents reported spray paint damage to outdoor signs at their homes. No arrests have been made.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
teenage angst has paid off well...
So in walking past a major concert venue, I thought about the last ten years, and how each decade tends to have its defining genres and cultural benchmarks. Maybe it's too early to tell my wiser companion says, but upon consulting the Dictionary of Imaginary Places, as we are well-versed in the Bookly Arts, it's probably that whole emo thing when everyone my age and younger decided to stop listening to Limp Bizkit and move on to bands like one acquaintance of mine referred to as "As I Lay Dying in a Poisoned Well on Thursday's Darkest Hour."
After so many hardcore shows full of mediocre bands whose names and sounds blended together, the way that Myspace seemed to highlight just another clique of people obsessed with image and status with more exhibitionistic ways to express it, and I found it amusing to see it mutate into its own thing, hearing parents talk about how their kid is hanging out with the "emos" and such. What started out as something with some good originators (hello Rites of Spring and Sunny Day Real Estate!) ended up more or less being the love child of goth angst and hair metal excess of my generation. It was hard to tell the scene kids apart from Nikki Sixx after awhile.
I don't know if this is all as big as it once was, because my sister and her friends like all that kind of boring indie stuff and disdain the "scene kids" with their eyeliner and crazy hair. I see a lot of t-shirts of bands that I pre-judge as crappy and generic based on the neon dayglo designs (superficial I know, but Randal assures me that http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifthese groups suck though he's more curmudgeonly than me).
Anyways, we found this in the dictionary of imaginary places, and the mentions of big hair and tattoos made me laugh. Click through, kids.
An island of Emo, where the savage natives have big hair that requires a lot of maintenance, tattoo each other until they're thirty, and worship a giant eel. Heck yeah. Teenage angst has paid off well, kids. Now I'm not-so-bored, but definitely getting old.
After so many hardcore shows full of mediocre bands whose names and sounds blended together, the way that Myspace seemed to highlight just another clique of people obsessed with image and status with more exhibitionistic ways to express it, and I found it amusing to see it mutate into its own thing, hearing parents talk about how their kid is hanging out with the "emos" and such. What started out as something with some good originators (hello Rites of Spring and Sunny Day Real Estate!) ended up more or less being the love child of goth angst and hair metal excess of my generation. It was hard to tell the scene kids apart from Nikki Sixx after awhile.
I don't know if this is all as big as it once was, because my sister and her friends like all that kind of boring indie stuff and disdain the "scene kids" with their eyeliner and crazy hair. I see a lot of t-shirts of bands that I pre-judge as crappy and generic based on the neon dayglo designs (superficial I know, but Randal assures me that http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifthese groups suck though he's more curmudgeonly than me).
Anyways, we found this in the dictionary of imaginary places, and the mentions of big hair and tattoos made me laugh. Click through, kids.
An island of Emo, where the savage natives have big hair that requires a lot of maintenance, tattoo each other until they're thirty, and worship a giant eel. Heck yeah. Teenage angst has paid off well, kids. Now I'm not-so-bored, but definitely getting old.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Best of the Blotter: First World Problems and the Real Housewives of Solon
DISORDERLY CONDUCT (FIGHTING); BAINBRIDGE ROAD: Two neighbors with a shared back yard were cited on the Fourth of July after one woman, 47, reported at 6:16 p.m. that she had accidentally run over her neighbor’s son’s toy football while mowing the lawn, then accused the mother of attempting to choke her over it.
The mother, 41, countered that her family had been playing in the backyard when the neighbor got her lawn mower out and without any explanation started mowing, promptly ruining the football.
She said the two then got into a brief shoving match that was self-defense on her part, having merely “pushed back after she was pushed.” After further review, police issued misdemeanor citations to both women.
STRONGSVILLE
A bizarre assault call confirmed two things: Bananas do not like gorillas or the Verizon Wireless network. Just before 3 p.m. June 29, officers arrived at The Wireless Center at 14150 Pearl Road because the business’s advertising mascot, a gorilla, was attacked by a banana. Store management told police that an individual dressed as a banana tackled the businesses mascot. The banana-wearing perpetrator then fled on foot southbound on Pearl Road with four males. According to the store manager, the gorilla was not injured, just embarrassed. Police were unable to locate the banana.
GENERAL ASSISTANCE, WEST WASHINGTON STREET: A woman called the department July 7 to see about getting someone to remove a squirrel carcass from the side of her house. Assistance was rendered.
LARCENY, HURLINGHAM ROAD: On July 10, a woman reported the theft of jewelry, a dress shirt, a sweater, a handbag and a scarf from her home. She valued the items at $16,000.
SUSPICION, WILSON MILLS ROAD: On June 30, a manager of Qdoba Mexican Grill reported a group of women jumped out of a vehicle, ran around the parking lot, then got back into the vehicle and left the area toward Denny’s.
Police told the manager the women may have been part of a scavenger hunt in the area.
SPECIAL ATTENTION, FRANKLIN BOULEVARD: On June 29, a resident reported about half a dozen golf balls in his backyard. He was not sure who hit the balls, but was concerned about young children who may get injured by playing in the backyard.
SUSPICION, COLDSTREAM ROAD: A caller reported on June 30 that she heard two loud gunshots in the area. The person called back and said she heard two loud explosions south of her residence.
Police said it was probably fireworks.
MISCHIEF, HARTFORD TRAIL: Police noted at 11:40 p.m. July 8 that a large landscaping rock had been painted to look like “the old Bob Marley Jamaican flag.”
CIVIL MATTER, PEARL ROAD: At 4:56 p.m. July 9, a woman reported that she took her $1,500 insulated mink coat to a Strongsville dry cleaners a month ago, and was charged $35 even though it was not cleaned.
According to the complainant, she took the coat back to the business, and was told it would be cleaned again without charge. A police report indicated the coat had a dark spot on the sleeve that appeared to be a watermark, and there was dirt on the garment.
The complainant, said the coat was sent from Korea, wanted the incident noted.
Man pulls out a sword during fight
A man pulled out a sword during an argument in the Burger King parking lot on Detroit Avenue at around 2:30 p.m. June 26. Police were unable to find the suspect.
The mother, 41, countered that her family had been playing in the backyard when the neighbor got her lawn mower out and without any explanation started mowing, promptly ruining the football.
She said the two then got into a brief shoving match that was self-defense on her part, having merely “pushed back after she was pushed.” After further review, police issued misdemeanor citations to both women.
STRONGSVILLE
A bizarre assault call confirmed two things: Bananas do not like gorillas or the Verizon Wireless network. Just before 3 p.m. June 29, officers arrived at The Wireless Center at 14150 Pearl Road because the business’s advertising mascot, a gorilla, was attacked by a banana. Store management told police that an individual dressed as a banana tackled the businesses mascot. The banana-wearing perpetrator then fled on foot southbound on Pearl Road with four males. According to the store manager, the gorilla was not injured, just embarrassed. Police were unable to locate the banana.
GENERAL ASSISTANCE, WEST WASHINGTON STREET: A woman called the department July 7 to see about getting someone to remove a squirrel carcass from the side of her house. Assistance was rendered.
LARCENY, HURLINGHAM ROAD: On July 10, a woman reported the theft of jewelry, a dress shirt, a sweater, a handbag and a scarf from her home. She valued the items at $16,000.
SUSPICION, WILSON MILLS ROAD: On June 30, a manager of Qdoba Mexican Grill reported a group of women jumped out of a vehicle, ran around the parking lot, then got back into the vehicle and left the area toward Denny’s.
Police told the manager the women may have been part of a scavenger hunt in the area.
SPECIAL ATTENTION, FRANKLIN BOULEVARD: On June 29, a resident reported about half a dozen golf balls in his backyard. He was not sure who hit the balls, but was concerned about young children who may get injured by playing in the backyard.
SUSPICION, COLDSTREAM ROAD: A caller reported on June 30 that she heard two loud gunshots in the area. The person called back and said she heard two loud explosions south of her residence.
Police said it was probably fireworks.
MISCHIEF, HARTFORD TRAIL: Police noted at 11:40 p.m. July 8 that a large landscaping rock had been painted to look like “the old Bob Marley Jamaican flag.”
CIVIL MATTER, PEARL ROAD: At 4:56 p.m. July 9, a woman reported that she took her $1,500 insulated mink coat to a Strongsville dry cleaners a month ago, and was charged $35 even though it was not cleaned.
According to the complainant, she took the coat back to the business, and was told it would be cleaned again without charge. A police report indicated the coat had a dark spot on the sleeve that appeared to be a watermark, and there was dirt on the garment.
The complainant, said the coat was sent from Korea, wanted the incident noted.
Man pulls out a sword during fight
A man pulled out a sword during an argument in the Burger King parking lot on Detroit Avenue at around 2:30 p.m. June 26. Police were unable to find the suspect.
Friday, January 28, 2011
suburban angstas "we're not the first and we know we're not the last..."
One of my friends from the hallowed slacker Tri-C days of yore, who made the Cleveland Scene for Dumbest Quote of the Year for selling a parental-advisory-stickered CD to a grade schooler saying he'd "sell it to a fetus if he had to," declared that if he was elected Mayor of Strongsville, he would change the mascot on the downtown water tower to the Wu-Tangs instead of the Mustangs due to the high volume of suburban hip-hop fanhood in said land to the south.
My east siders find it supremely ironic that the white kids of the southern suburbs adored the crew while mostly oblivious to the whole Five Percenter thing, but it was what it was. And ODB's stage crash was infinitely more awesome than Kanye's. For the children, indeed.
There will always be suburban kids who love hip-hop for the same reason that white kids have always turned to African-rooted music. It's danceable, freaks out their parents (see: jazz, early rock and roll, etc), and is eventually co-opted into a sanitized mainstream culturally acceptable form, usually getting whiter in the process. The next musical form that freaks out/totally annoys the future white suburban parents my age who loved A Tribe Called Quest and the Roots will probably have African diasporic roots too.
My dad can't stand hip-hop but loves Beck, and made up parody lyrics to "Loser" when it came out that became an inside joke with his fellow truck-driving coworkers whose careers involve purveying bread of all kinds to the good people of the hood.
Meanwhile, in Crackerland, as it's been since the 1960's, there will always be disaffected youths who will turn to loud music with electric guitars that may or may not freak out their parents even if they don't understand this new sound that the Kids are into these days.
While the medium on which the music is recorded may change (see cassettes, vinyl, compact disc, MP3), The Kids will more or less look the same regardless of decade and are somewhat interchangeable, as what's basic yet never terribly fashionable can never go out of style. Jeans, black t-shirts, basic footwear usually of the Converse variety, zip-up hoodies, the occasional Joey Ramone leather jacket? The haircuts may vary in volume, the glasses may look different, but the basics are still there.
The Kids may not be getting stoned, but they love kung-fu movies, played Stratomatic in the 60's and 70's (because in the inner suburbs, it's still acceptable to be into sports and music), videogames from the 80's until now, guitars if they were available, and still probably spend a lot of time driving around aimlessly listening to music and discussing high school politics, and dishing snarky pop/subculture commentary at an all-night diner or the nearest coffeeshop.
One of my fellow peons from a generation old enough to have birthed me claims that in another 15 years, the Kids will no longer be listening to Slayer, but I disagree. For one thing, Slayer's older than I am, and their first record came out the year I was born.
17 years later, The Kids in my day mocked me for my love of U2 while extolling the virtues of Hell Awaits at the lunch table, while we regretted that we were too young to see Minor Threat or Nirvana or Led Zeppelin way back when and wondered if that new Alice in Chains song on the radio meant that maybe Layne Staley wasn't totally far gone yet.
My friends often had to turn their band t-shirts inside out (this was the post-Columbine era and any band t-shirt suggesting anything involving death and destruction was suspect), made fun of our valedictorian who didn't know what a pentagram was, and one of us, who also played on the football team, bore a startling resemblance to Kerry King, especially when he got tattoos post-graduation.
Even if you didn't know how to play anything else on the guitar, you knew how to play "Iron Man," and "Smoke on the Water." Every hardcore punk band I saw threw in a few bars of "Reign in Blood" when requested.
Maybe we Parmanians were just 20 years behind the times, but I'm sure there's kids sitting in a cafeteria right now listening to 70's punk, classic rock, and 80's thrash, just like we did. My little sister likes all this weaksauce indie, but her boyfriend's skater bros look just like my metalhead friends from back in the day.
I got the warm fuzzy feeling when I watched two teenage girls at My Mind's Eye buying pre- Blood Sugar Red Hot Chili Peppers albums on vinyl because I remember being that age and starting to delve into the underground gradually, or when my cousin posted pictures of his first electric guitar and is now presumably wailing away.
So boomers, thanks for Hendrix and Black Sabbath. We don't want to admit that we're still kind of like you (because who doesn't become their parents eventually?), because we insist that the sounds of our youth are the best they could be, but we have to give credit where it's due, and we have you to thank for spearheading the soundtracks and subcultures for disaffected and usually brilliant loners. Now, go retire so we can pay your pensions and stay employed.
Thanks.
My east siders find it supremely ironic that the white kids of the southern suburbs adored the crew while mostly oblivious to the whole Five Percenter thing, but it was what it was. And ODB's stage crash was infinitely more awesome than Kanye's. For the children, indeed.
There will always be suburban kids who love hip-hop for the same reason that white kids have always turned to African-rooted music. It's danceable, freaks out their parents (see: jazz, early rock and roll, etc), and is eventually co-opted into a sanitized mainstream culturally acceptable form, usually getting whiter in the process. The next musical form that freaks out/totally annoys the future white suburban parents my age who loved A Tribe Called Quest and the Roots will probably have African diasporic roots too.
My dad can't stand hip-hop but loves Beck, and made up parody lyrics to "Loser" when it came out that became an inside joke with his fellow truck-driving coworkers whose careers involve purveying bread of all kinds to the good people of the hood.
Meanwhile, in Crackerland, as it's been since the 1960's, there will always be disaffected youths who will turn to loud music with electric guitars that may or may not freak out their parents even if they don't understand this new sound that the Kids are into these days.
While the medium on which the music is recorded may change (see cassettes, vinyl, compact disc, MP3), The Kids will more or less look the same regardless of decade and are somewhat interchangeable, as what's basic yet never terribly fashionable can never go out of style. Jeans, black t-shirts, basic footwear usually of the Converse variety, zip-up hoodies, the occasional Joey Ramone leather jacket? The haircuts may vary in volume, the glasses may look different, but the basics are still there.
The Kids may not be getting stoned, but they love kung-fu movies, played Stratomatic in the 60's and 70's (because in the inner suburbs, it's still acceptable to be into sports and music), videogames from the 80's until now, guitars if they were available, and still probably spend a lot of time driving around aimlessly listening to music and discussing high school politics, and dishing snarky pop/subculture commentary at an all-night diner or the nearest coffeeshop.
One of my fellow peons from a generation old enough to have birthed me claims that in another 15 years, the Kids will no longer be listening to Slayer, but I disagree. For one thing, Slayer's older than I am, and their first record came out the year I was born.
17 years later, The Kids in my day mocked me for my love of U2 while extolling the virtues of Hell Awaits at the lunch table, while we regretted that we were too young to see Minor Threat or Nirvana or Led Zeppelin way back when and wondered if that new Alice in Chains song on the radio meant that maybe Layne Staley wasn't totally far gone yet.
My friends often had to turn their band t-shirts inside out (this was the post-Columbine era and any band t-shirt suggesting anything involving death and destruction was suspect), made fun of our valedictorian who didn't know what a pentagram was, and one of us, who also played on the football team, bore a startling resemblance to Kerry King, especially when he got tattoos post-graduation.
Even if you didn't know how to play anything else on the guitar, you knew how to play "Iron Man," and "Smoke on the Water." Every hardcore punk band I saw threw in a few bars of "Reign in Blood" when requested.
Maybe we Parmanians were just 20 years behind the times, but I'm sure there's kids sitting in a cafeteria right now listening to 70's punk, classic rock, and 80's thrash, just like we did. My little sister likes all this weaksauce indie, but her boyfriend's skater bros look just like my metalhead friends from back in the day.
I got the warm fuzzy feeling when I watched two teenage girls at My Mind's Eye buying pre- Blood Sugar Red Hot Chili Peppers albums on vinyl because I remember being that age and starting to delve into the underground gradually, or when my cousin posted pictures of his first electric guitar and is now presumably wailing away.
So boomers, thanks for Hendrix and Black Sabbath. We don't want to admit that we're still kind of like you (because who doesn't become their parents eventually?), because we insist that the sounds of our youth are the best they could be, but we have to give credit where it's due, and we have you to thank for spearheading the soundtracks and subcultures for disaffected and usually brilliant loners. Now, go retire so we can pay your pensions and stay employed.
Thanks.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
the customer is always...
The first time I saw 'Clerks' I was in a Kent State dorm room with a guy I'd just met right after I transferred from a school where the only permitted R-rated movies were "Braveheart" and "The Passion of the Christ" and where if you were in a guy's dorm room you had to have the door open, feet on the floor, and the lights on during certain visiting hours. It's no wonder I didn't last long there in the middle of nowhere.
It felt weird knowing that such bizarre rules did not exist, moving from there into what was almost a condemned building (broken windows, destroyed bathroom fixtures) with bushes covered in cigarette butts and all sorts of general debauchery and substance abuse.
But there's a place in my heart for Kevin Smith's characters, because unlike most movie characters, they reminded me of real people in a real setting that didn't seem all that far removed from my own economically depressed suburban world, with its dead-end jobs, unluckiness in love, obsession with pop culture ephemera (classic rock in particular), and lack of interest in upward mobility with a preference for perfected slacking.
Having always worked in customer service as a zoo ticket taker, seasonal retail salesgirl for two dreadful weeks when I was 19, and public sector peon for most of my life, the maxim that 'the customer is always right' is often wrong.
Though certain individuals claim to have "adopted" some of my coworkers, at least they don't have the option to do this, though it would be entertaining. I understand the whole respecting other people and cultures and lifestyle choices, but sometimes this gets a little pretentious or assumes that we're more narrow-minded than we actually are.
It felt weird knowing that such bizarre rules did not exist, moving from there into what was almost a condemned building (broken windows, destroyed bathroom fixtures) with bushes covered in cigarette butts and all sorts of general debauchery and substance abuse.
But there's a place in my heart for Kevin Smith's characters, because unlike most movie characters, they reminded me of real people in a real setting that didn't seem all that far removed from my own economically depressed suburban world, with its dead-end jobs, unluckiness in love, obsession with pop culture ephemera (classic rock in particular), and lack of interest in upward mobility with a preference for perfected slacking.
Having always worked in customer service as a zoo ticket taker, seasonal retail salesgirl for two dreadful weeks when I was 19, and public sector peon for most of my life, the maxim that 'the customer is always right' is often wrong.
Though certain individuals claim to have "adopted" some of my coworkers, at least they don't have the option to do this, though it would be entertaining. I understand the whole respecting other people and cultures and lifestyle choices, but sometimes this gets a little pretentious or assumes that we're more narrow-minded than we actually are.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
if I could, you know I would...
It's 2 in the morning and I've been sleeping since 8, waking up knowing I have to be up in another 6 hours and wondering how I messed up my sleep cycle so completely and wondering if that has to do with all the craziness around me hitting home.
The sirens are everywhere and I don't even want to know what's happening outside. I just want to fall back asleep and not be so congested.
Today was so beautiful and we drove out to Chagrin Falls where a strange convergence of bikers hanging out in front of Starbucks drinking macchiatos and people getting married occurred. And I realized I've never driven through 'where the other half lives,' this strange and beautiful land south and east where it feels like I'm in some BBC movie with these endless acres and big country houses, polo grounds, English nanny schools, and so many trees I realize that I've been profoundly nature-deprived. I don't know people who live in Gates Mills or Hunting Valley or whatever. I'm sure there's nice people there like there is anywhere. It just feels so far removed from my land of cheap apartments, gang graffiti, and loud car stereos.
It's not that things are so bad, it's just been hard to see all the stress around me and be unable to really do anything to help, feeling if anything like a nonentity or an impediment, that I always say the wrong thing, though I know most of this whole life thing isn't my fault. I think I'm going to come away from all this stronger and more sure despite all the shifts and transitions.
It's helped to retreat into art, and I've discovered the wonders of the Cudell Art Center where you can go and work with clay, make pottery, sculpt stuff, and glaze it and hang out with really chill people and it's free, which is amazing. And when I'm not there, I come home and splice together the leftovers in the kitchen and then get out the paints, finding catharsis in the way the colors run together and listening to all my old music.
Thankful for the friends who've stuck with me through this season of struggle, who've let me cry and vent, helped me jump through the hoops of the legal system, encouraged me in making art, made dinner with me, been wonderful companions for adventures. It's meant so much to have that in my life to balance out the hurts.
And I'm wide awake now, listening to this song over and over again, grieving some losses and some current losing, knowing that this is only the beginning, that this is part of continuing to live and be human and that there's a long trail of it ahead...
If you twist and turn away
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate
If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame
If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I'd lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day
To let it go
And so to fade away
To let it go
And so fade away
I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no
If you should ask then maybe they'd
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes
If I could, you know I would
If I could, I would
Let it go...
This desperation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go
And so fade away
To let it go
And so fade away
To let it go
And so to fade away
I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no
The sirens are everywhere and I don't even want to know what's happening outside. I just want to fall back asleep and not be so congested.
Today was so beautiful and we drove out to Chagrin Falls where a strange convergence of bikers hanging out in front of Starbucks drinking macchiatos and people getting married occurred. And I realized I've never driven through 'where the other half lives,' this strange and beautiful land south and east where it feels like I'm in some BBC movie with these endless acres and big country houses, polo grounds, English nanny schools, and so many trees I realize that I've been profoundly nature-deprived. I don't know people who live in Gates Mills or Hunting Valley or whatever. I'm sure there's nice people there like there is anywhere. It just feels so far removed from my land of cheap apartments, gang graffiti, and loud car stereos.
It's not that things are so bad, it's just been hard to see all the stress around me and be unable to really do anything to help, feeling if anything like a nonentity or an impediment, that I always say the wrong thing, though I know most of this whole life thing isn't my fault. I think I'm going to come away from all this stronger and more sure despite all the shifts and transitions.
It's helped to retreat into art, and I've discovered the wonders of the Cudell Art Center where you can go and work with clay, make pottery, sculpt stuff, and glaze it and hang out with really chill people and it's free, which is amazing. And when I'm not there, I come home and splice together the leftovers in the kitchen and then get out the paints, finding catharsis in the way the colors run together and listening to all my old music.
Thankful for the friends who've stuck with me through this season of struggle, who've let me cry and vent, helped me jump through the hoops of the legal system, encouraged me in making art, made dinner with me, been wonderful companions for adventures. It's meant so much to have that in my life to balance out the hurts.
And I'm wide awake now, listening to this song over and over again, grieving some losses and some current losing, knowing that this is only the beginning, that this is part of continuing to live and be human and that there's a long trail of it ahead...
If you twist and turn away
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate
If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame
If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I'd lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day
To let it go
And so to fade away
To let it go
And so fade away
I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no
If you should ask then maybe they'd
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes
If I could, you know I would
If I could, I would
Let it go...
This desperation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go
And so fade away
To let it go
And so fade away
To let it go
And so to fade away
I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no
Thursday, September 16, 2010
best of the blotter 27 (updated)
ANIMAL AT LARGE, GENEVA STREET: A man was cited for violating leash laws Sept. 8 after his black dog ran into a police car on patrol.
Police noted, it was not the first time the same dog has run into the cruiser.
The owner said he would check his dog for injuries
PETTY THEFT, WESTGATE MALL: Police responded to Target at about 11:30 a.m. Sept. 7 on a report of two girls in custody for shoplifting. Police were told that the girls apparently concealed about $130 of clothing in a large red purse. One of the girls tried on boots and tried to leave the store with them on. When police arrived, they started questioning the girls, but neither had identification. Both claimed to be juveniles. Police asked their birthdays and ages, and when the girls’ answers didn’t add up, police figured out that they had two male suspects dressed as girls. Police arrested an 18-year-old Cleveland man and a 17-year-old Cleveland boy and charged them with petty theft.
THEFT, WILSON MILLS: A Mayfield Heights girl was arrested for shoplifting from Kohl’s, 6245 Wilson Mills.
When asked about her parents, the girl told police they lived in Russia. Police later discovered the girl’s parents lived in Mayfield Heights and she was released to them.
NOISE DISTURBANCE, ABBEY ROAD: At 1:12 a.m. Sept. 6 an officer responded to the Cedarwood Estates complex to assist another patrolman with a complaint of a man singing. The officers walked the area and located an outdoor karaoke party. The homeowner was issued a summons for a noise disturbance.
BURGLARY, CLARENCE AVENUE: A woman told police on Sept. 2 that while she was in the hospital, her apartment was broken into and trashed. Police found no forced entry and nothing missing. The trouble was a civil matter over a messy apartment.
ASSAULT, SOLON ROAD: A boy, 16, riding a lawn tractor home Sept. 7 after his father had it repaired at Solon Hardware Store on Melbury Drive was confronted by a group of four to five boys who got him off the tractor, at which point one of the boys punched him in the face while the others egged him on — one of them filming the attack on his cell phone. Police broke the fight up, charging one of the boys, 16, in the attack, while three other boys are being referred to juvenile court on possible charges of inciting to violence. The basis for the dispute appears to be a stolen iPod.
BURGLARY, AURORA ROAD: A Solon woman, 40, reported Monday someone slid open a first-floor bedroom window and came in her condo, taking two game systems, controllers and games, a tennis bracelet and a pair of earrings valued at $1,680. The victim believes the theft may also be related to the theft of the iPod that led to the hijacked lawn tractor Sept. 7.
ASSAULT, AURORA ROAD: A Garfield Heights woman, 24, employed at Station 43, said she was struck in the back of the neck by a co-worker Saturday after they got into an argument over the “Special of the Day.” A Bedford Heights man, 41, was arrested.
THEFT, BAINBRIDGE ROAD: The owner of Cellphones For Cancer reported Friday six of 13 political yard signs he posted in front of his business had been stolen.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, PEARL ROAD: At 6:54 p.m. Thursday, employees at Buffalo Wild Wings Grill and Bar told police that an older man had been in the business’ restroom for a while, and when they inquired into his well-being, he answered, “I’m OK. I’m just doing heroin.”
Police were unable to locate any drugs or drug paraphernalia in the restroom, and determined the man did not appear to be under the influence.
The man was taken to a bus stop.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, JONATHAN DRIVE: A woman woke to a strange sight in her front lawn on Friday morning. In the lawn was a staked sign that read “Ye shall reap what ye has sown” on one side, and “Repent Diane, the end is near” on the other.
The resident identified a suspect, who reportedly recently sent a private investigator to her place of employment.
INDECENT EXPOSURE, ROYALTON ROAD: An older white male in a wheelchair wearing no pants reportedly traveled on Muraski Elementary School property at approximately 3:39 p.m. Friday.
TRAFFIC STOP, CLIFTON BOULEVARD: At 10:36 a.m. Sept. 9, police responding to an altercation cited a woman for excessive horn blowing and cited a man for disorderly conduct
PROPERTY IMPOUND, DETROIT AVENUE: Police received a butcher knife and sock stuffed under a trash bin at 10:24 a.m. Sept. 8.
SPECIAL ATTENTION, HIGHLAND ROAD: A resident reported Sept. 8 a male came to their home the previous evening and said he was doing a homework assignment and wanted to interview them. They said they wouldn’t let him in despite him being adamant about it. He was described as being in his late teens with full sleeve tattoos on both arms.
“DISTURBING” KITCHEN? A customer at a N. Court Street Chinese food buffet became upset after he claimed he saw a “disturbing” incident in the kitchen on Sept. 3. The man began yelling and the manager asked him to leave the restaurant, so the man left but did not pay for the food he had eaten prior to the outburst. The manager provided a description of the man to police and asked to have him banned if he was found.
Police noted, it was not the first time the same dog has run into the cruiser.
The owner said he would check his dog for injuries
PETTY THEFT, WESTGATE MALL: Police responded to Target at about 11:30 a.m. Sept. 7 on a report of two girls in custody for shoplifting. Police were told that the girls apparently concealed about $130 of clothing in a large red purse. One of the girls tried on boots and tried to leave the store with them on. When police arrived, they started questioning the girls, but neither had identification. Both claimed to be juveniles. Police asked their birthdays and ages, and when the girls’ answers didn’t add up, police figured out that they had two male suspects dressed as girls. Police arrested an 18-year-old Cleveland man and a 17-year-old Cleveland boy and charged them with petty theft.
THEFT, WILSON MILLS: A Mayfield Heights girl was arrested for shoplifting from Kohl’s, 6245 Wilson Mills.
When asked about her parents, the girl told police they lived in Russia. Police later discovered the girl’s parents lived in Mayfield Heights and she was released to them.
NOISE DISTURBANCE, ABBEY ROAD: At 1:12 a.m. Sept. 6 an officer responded to the Cedarwood Estates complex to assist another patrolman with a complaint of a man singing. The officers walked the area and located an outdoor karaoke party. The homeowner was issued a summons for a noise disturbance.
BURGLARY, CLARENCE AVENUE: A woman told police on Sept. 2 that while she was in the hospital, her apartment was broken into and trashed. Police found no forced entry and nothing missing. The trouble was a civil matter over a messy apartment.
ASSAULT, SOLON ROAD: A boy, 16, riding a lawn tractor home Sept. 7 after his father had it repaired at Solon Hardware Store on Melbury Drive was confronted by a group of four to five boys who got him off the tractor, at which point one of the boys punched him in the face while the others egged him on — one of them filming the attack on his cell phone. Police broke the fight up, charging one of the boys, 16, in the attack, while three other boys are being referred to juvenile court on possible charges of inciting to violence. The basis for the dispute appears to be a stolen iPod.
BURGLARY, AURORA ROAD: A Solon woman, 40, reported Monday someone slid open a first-floor bedroom window and came in her condo, taking two game systems, controllers and games, a tennis bracelet and a pair of earrings valued at $1,680. The victim believes the theft may also be related to the theft of the iPod that led to the hijacked lawn tractor Sept. 7.
ASSAULT, AURORA ROAD: A Garfield Heights woman, 24, employed at Station 43, said she was struck in the back of the neck by a co-worker Saturday after they got into an argument over the “Special of the Day.” A Bedford Heights man, 41, was arrested.
THEFT, BAINBRIDGE ROAD: The owner of Cellphones For Cancer reported Friday six of 13 political yard signs he posted in front of his business had been stolen.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, PEARL ROAD: At 6:54 p.m. Thursday, employees at Buffalo Wild Wings Grill and Bar told police that an older man had been in the business’ restroom for a while, and when they inquired into his well-being, he answered, “I’m OK. I’m just doing heroin.”
Police were unable to locate any drugs or drug paraphernalia in the restroom, and determined the man did not appear to be under the influence.
The man was taken to a bus stop.
SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, JONATHAN DRIVE: A woman woke to a strange sight in her front lawn on Friday morning. In the lawn was a staked sign that read “Ye shall reap what ye has sown” on one side, and “Repent Diane, the end is near” on the other.
The resident identified a suspect, who reportedly recently sent a private investigator to her place of employment.
INDECENT EXPOSURE, ROYALTON ROAD: An older white male in a wheelchair wearing no pants reportedly traveled on Muraski Elementary School property at approximately 3:39 p.m. Friday.
TRAFFIC STOP, CLIFTON BOULEVARD: At 10:36 a.m. Sept. 9, police responding to an altercation cited a woman for excessive horn blowing and cited a man for disorderly conduct
PROPERTY IMPOUND, DETROIT AVENUE: Police received a butcher knife and sock stuffed under a trash bin at 10:24 a.m. Sept. 8.
SPECIAL ATTENTION, HIGHLAND ROAD: A resident reported Sept. 8 a male came to their home the previous evening and said he was doing a homework assignment and wanted to interview them. They said they wouldn’t let him in despite him being adamant about it. He was described as being in his late teens with full sleeve tattoos on both arms.
“DISTURBING” KITCHEN? A customer at a N. Court Street Chinese food buffet became upset after he claimed he saw a “disturbing” incident in the kitchen on Sept. 3. The man began yelling and the manager asked him to leave the restaurant, so the man left but did not pay for the food he had eaten prior to the outburst. The manager provided a description of the man to police and asked to have him banned if he was found.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
blast from the past
Don't know how I stumbled across this, but someone has old Camcorder footage of Marc's Funtime Pizza Palace, the low-budget answer to Chuck E. Cheese, where I attended numerous grade-school birthday parties that were spent eating greasy pizza and playing endless games of skee-ball by myself because I really wasn't friends with any of the kids but it was something to do.
I'd come home with prizes like cheap Chinese fans that always broke a day later or those necklaces they used to have that looked like seashells and contained bubble-blowing liquid that reminded me of the Little Mermaid, which had come out around that time. Back then, it was the best place ever, and it never seemed weird to me that the puppet show was out of sync and the moonwalk was always broken whenever I was there.
But yeah, this looks exactly how I remember.
I'd come home with prizes like cheap Chinese fans that always broke a day later or those necklaces they used to have that looked like seashells and contained bubble-blowing liquid that reminded me of the Little Mermaid, which had come out around that time. Back then, it was the best place ever, and it never seemed weird to me that the puppet show was out of sync and the moonwalk was always broken whenever I was there.
But yeah, this looks exactly how I remember.
Friday, May 22, 2009
summer in the city's such a very special time...
Usually if I end up at the beach, it's Edgewater, due to proximity and the endless cast of characters hanging out there, but last night we drove out to meet up with some friends at Huntington, which looks a bit cleaner, but always seems to have higher bacteria levels than the much derided former.
We got ice cream and watched the sunset, digging our feet into the sand, letting the water wash over. The outer suburbs give me a little bit of culture shock now, I'm more used to old men smoking hookah, girls with big gold earrings and tattoos and guys smoking black & milds than tiny blondes with their lacrosse-playing boyfriends.
But it was beautiful and warm. And we could hang out there past sunset watching the lights of the city glitter in the distance. There is something so soothing about being next to the water.
And I picked up my tickets to see the Roots when they come through at the end of June. I missed them when they played at Kent State, and I missed them twice when they came through Cleveland, so I'm really looking forward to this.
I'm not sure what this Memorial Day weekend has in store, except for dinner with some friends of me and the roommate's Monday night. Everything else is open-ended, and I'm sure it will be good.
We got ice cream and watched the sunset, digging our feet into the sand, letting the water wash over. The outer suburbs give me a little bit of culture shock now, I'm more used to old men smoking hookah, girls with big gold earrings and tattoos and guys smoking black & milds than tiny blondes with their lacrosse-playing boyfriends.
But it was beautiful and warm. And we could hang out there past sunset watching the lights of the city glitter in the distance. There is something so soothing about being next to the water.
And I picked up my tickets to see the Roots when they come through at the end of June. I missed them when they played at Kent State, and I missed them twice when they came through Cleveland, so I'm really looking forward to this.
I'm not sure what this Memorial Day weekend has in store, except for dinner with some friends of me and the roommate's Monday night. Everything else is open-ended, and I'm sure it will be good.
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