Showing posts with label darn kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label darn kids. Show all posts

Friday, June 24, 2011

best of the blotter : patchouli and pets

ASSIST, MAYFIELD ROAD: An extremely upset resident called police at 2:10 a.m. June 17 because her cat was stuck behind a couch. Responding officers safely rescued the cat.

IDLE CHATTER, NOTTINGHAM COURT: A Nottingham Court woman told police that she heard a suspicious vehicle idling outside her home around 9:20 p.m. June 16. Officers responded and observed that the idling sound was actually the woman’s refrigerator.

Lakewood:

Kids smoking something strange in the restroom

Police were notified of four people smoking in the restroom at Lakewood Park at 7 p.m. June 16. The caller said the group — one female and three males — left behind a bag containing an unknown substance. Officers determined that the bag contained incense.

Criminal damaging

Police received a call about a group of children throwing eggs and writing on the side of a building in the 1400 block of Winchester Avenue on June 16. The children — all between the ages of seven and 10 — were advised by police. The caller said he would clean up the mess, which was determined to be impermanent.


Just so you know, dear Strongvillandia readers, gangstas don't tend to use eggs when targeting the cars of their victims.

More fun from the land down under:

Concerned passersby asked police to check on an older man walking on Main Street wearing only a T-shirt and underwear about 10 a.m. June 17.

Officers caught up with the man, who was not, in fact, exercising in his underwear, but wearing short shorts. He told police he appreciated the concern.

A Meadow Lane man called police about 11:45 p.m. June 14 to say he was living in fear and wanted to know when he could use lethal force on his neighbors. The man was very intoxicated, the report said, and was advised to stay in his house and go to sleep.

He apparently did not listen, because a resident called police to report hearing yelling and profanity a half hour later. The intoxicated man also called 911 again to say his neighbors came over and told him to "back off, dude" when he was in his own yard. He was arrested.

WESTLAKE:

Graffiti Artist Hits Bassett Building with Chief Wahoo

A Bassett Road building owner found a Chief Wahoo, along with other graffiti, on his dumpster enclosure at about 5:30 a.m. April 10. The victim suspects skateboarders who hang out in the area. He requested that officers cite any skateboarders on the property.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

best of the blotter: guns, baby raccoons, and broken things

NORTH ROYALTON
Some people never learn. While making a traffic stop at 9:02 p.m. June 1 at the North Royalton Speedway station, a cop observed a man walk past his patrol car carrying a six-pack. The man got into the driver’s side of a white Mercury displaying yellow OVI tags. The driver, who is under suspension with limited privileges, stated he was on his way home from an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and stopped to get gas, and apparently some beer. The man was issued a citation for driving under an OVI suspension and will appear in court.

USING WEAPONS WHILE INTOXICATED-AGGRAVATED MENACING, KENNETH AVENUE: A Gerald Avenue man, 29, was arrested June 4 after he allegedly used a shotgun to threaten party-goers on Kenneth.

It happened at about 10:45 p.m. The man had crashed the party. He reportedly was belligerent.

A friend of the party’s host asked the man to leave but he refused. Three others then escorted the man toward West 60th Street.

The man started throwing beer cans at the victims. He then entered his house and grabbed a shotgun.

The man returned to the party with the weapon. He repeatedly tried to cock the shotgun but failed each time. Someone called police.

Police found the intoxicated man walking in the street. They found his weapon leaning against a tree in front of a Kenneth house. Shells had been placed backwards in the shotgun.

GENERAL ASSISTANCE, WILSON MILLS ROAD: On June 2, a resident made a complaint of a tow motor making too much noise at Home Depot.

Management was advised of the complaint.

ANIMALS, WILSON MILLS ROAD: On June 1, a rescue squad was called for a report that a baby raccoon scratched a couple of children.

Police said the children went into the woods, brought out the baby raccoon and began to play with it.

The squad was canceled and no scratches were found on the children. The juveniles were released to their parents.

FIGHT, HEALTHWAY DRIVE: A man arrived at the Avon Emergency Room on June 2 claiming he was involved in a shooting in Cleveland. The patient said he was involved in a physical altercation, where he was shot at but not hit. The injury to his arm, he reported, was from being hit by a log during the fight.

MISCHIEF, CHILLICOTHE ROAD: Someone removed letters from a sign at Riverview Church and rearranged other letters June 3 to spell “In yo face Lord.”
Church employees requested extra patrols.

LAKEWOOD
Employees at China Express told police on May 30 that a man tried to enter the restaurant through the back before getting away with a box of chopsticks.

A Hilliard Boulevard resident reported seeing an asteroid at about 6 a.m. Wednesday. The resident told police that there was a flash, followed by a loud explosion. Responding fficers didn’t find any asteroids, crashed UFOs or alien life forms in the area.

THEFT, MAIN STREET: A store employee at the All Matters Gallery reported June 2 that a man wearing a scarf, gray sweatpants, and a shirt described as a “wife beater” took three crystals valued at $77 and placed them in his pocket, then attempted to leave the store.

When the employee confronted him outside, he gave the crystals back and said he was unsure where he was supposed to pay for them. Police took the description of the suspect and assembled a photo lineup of suspects, resulting in a warrant being issued for a man, 44, who is believed to still be living in the area.

Oh, Avon Lake!

Dangerous maneuvers

Police received multiple reports of a white male, believed to be a teen, walking in the middle of the roadway on Walker Road near the American Legion Hall March 21. Police made a report for juvenile court.

Some teens in a Pontiac LeMans were seen throwing something at a road sign on Long Road as they were heading towards Stoney Ridge around 3:45 p.m. on June 1.

Police found the remnants of what looked to be a ceramic art project near the sign.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

best of the blotter: those darn kids and the end of the world

ARMAGEDDON, SYCAMORE TREE: In the wake of Harold Camping’s prediction that the Christian rapture would occur on May 21 and the end of the world would begin, the world and media was abuzz last week while following the peculiar story. Apparently, the affects of Camping’s prediction stretched into Medina. A Sycamore Tree Dr. resident stopped an officer on May 17 and desired to speak with him about Armageddon. No action was taken.

BB OR NOT TO BE, ORCHARD LANE: Police responded to Orchard Lane upon report of a boy allegedly using a BB gun in the neighborhood. An officer arrived around 2 p.m. on May 18 and observed the boy shooting what appeared to be a BB gun. Upon closer inspection, the officer determined that the gun was an air-soft gun, and the boy was shooting at mushrooms in the yard of his home.

Someone called Georgio's, 15037 Pearl Rd., May 21 with a tasty order -- 100 calzones and 100 salads. And they'd even pay extra for it and have the restaurant send back the overage. An alert employee recognized it as a scam. She called police to make them aware the con, which was also reported earlier this year, is going around again.

DISORDERLY CONDUCT, BRIDGE STREET: Sparks flew before a police officer had a chance to officially start his workday.

The officer stopped at Caf Ah-Roma at 11:40 a.m. May 21 prior to starting his work day.

He saw a teen, whom the officer knew, toss some type of fireworks into the mulch by the Parkway Shops sign on Bridge Street. The item gave off quite a few sparks before extinguishing itself.

The teen has been warned by police and Giant Eagle personnel to stay away from that area.

The officer stopped the teen and found two lighters, two boxes of smoke balls, rolling papers and a box of cigarettes on him.

When asked why he ignited the fireworks, the teen told the officer, “You guys tell us to be kids, then you arrest us when we try.”

The officer said there was a big difference between being a kid and throwing lighted fireworks into mulch and at a place he had been told not to visit.

The teen was cited for disorderly conduct, trespassing and possessing tobacco.

THEFT, WEST BAGLEY ROAD: Someone from Colony Roofing, 951 W. Bagley Road, contacted police May 16 after seeing a person taking scrap metal. The person got into a car and left.

Police found him with a woman on Kaskey Drive. The teen said he needed the scrap metal to help pay for the prom.

The 17-year-old Brook Park resident was released to his father. His 18-year-old accomplice, a woman from Brook Park, was released on personal bond. Both were cited for theft.

PROPERTY DAMAGE, BROOKPARK ROAD: A 20-year-old Brook Park man rammed a shopping cart into the glass windows and doors of the B & E Dollar Tree May 21 and made entry to the store.

When police arrived, the man was inside the store wearing Hawaiian leis and other necklaces found in the store. He was cooperative, handcuffed and placed under arrest. The intoxicated man told police that he was at a wedding next door and wanted some necklaces for the party. Estimated damage to the glass is $1,000.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

in which I will probably offend and be misunderstood by 85% of my not-so-devoted readers

So the first thing I heard on the radio this morning was CSNY's "Ohio," and I was a bit surprised not to hear any commentary from the Boomer Overlords about the anniversary day of the most significant event to happen at my alma mater.

There's a parking lot now where the shooting happened and every year lots of aging hippies crawl out of the woodwork to protest downtown, women with hair down to their knees and faded Oberlin College t-shirts, men with coolie hats and t-shirts with the Vietnam flag on them telling you "I was there, maaaan!" and all sorts of other types who show up for such things.

Because of my reputation as a "random force of chaos" and because despite my introverted tendencies I somehow get acquainted with a strange mix of people, I ended up hanging out with a crusty punk kid with feathers in his matted hair who called himself Cobalt who'd ridden on top of trains to get here for the big protest (this was in the heart of Dubya's second term). His clothes smelled so bad that the ARA girl he knew here had to hang them outside her dorm room window.

He joined our dinner table and watched the Black Keys with my crew of friends (who told me afterwards "we just all assumed that he was someone you knew"). We all went to the playground at midnight to go on the swings and hang out in the parking lot and then the next day me and him sat outside debating politics and religion while while eating out of a jar of ancient organic peanut butter with our fingers. He was "fighting capitalism" by stealing pens from campus offices so people couldn't write checks and coughing up blood every five minutes and I'm amazed I didn't get sick, but I did buy him food on my meal plan because I had a week of school left and a few hundred dollars to burn. I wonder where he is now.

We had a May 4th room in the library that was a popular destination for vacationing Freedom Rockers and a haunt for dirty old men as it had a computer and was dark, and every year the school has a big symposium where the likes of Bobby Seale and Jello Biafra speak, music by people like Country Joe, and a lot of general hagiography and accompanying mythology surrounding the event. It's like 9/11 for the Woodstockers and their acolytes more or less. "Tell me Father, did they aim?, and all that.

I asked my dad about it, since I grew up on his record collection full of Creedence, Neil Young, and Hendrix, and since he had neither money or grades for college and didn't want to Vietnam if he didn't have to (being skeptical of our reasons for being there), he was in the National Guard at the time, but stationed in Toledo (going off base to see the MC5 at Bowling Green and feeling like he looked like a spook) and he says that the 60's had a lot of great music but were hell to live through.

He doesn't have much patience for most of his generation and this probably explains a lot of my cynicism about suburban crackers who listened to Zeppelin and now dig smooth jazz, who wax poetic about "True Revolutionaries like Che Guevara" but drive new SUVs and live in the suburbs away from all "those people" but will tell you about that one black friend they had in college who had an Afro and was down with Malcolm X.

There were a lot of activist groups when I was there, and while there were some really great people who've no doubt gone on to try to save the world, there were also a lot of holier-than-thou types who believed that bathing was "fascist" and more than a few trust-fund socialists from Hudson who drove nice cars and wore Nautica chinos with their Che shirt and it was very hard for me to take them seriously when I was selling my books and CDs for grocery money, working 30 hours a week, and walking everywhere.



Certain members of my family blame my Kent State education for making me a flaming liberal but if anything, my time there soured me on both sides so completely as things like Abu Ghraib and the torture memos began to come out and the rank hypocrisy of those who claim to be more moral and Christian justified the unjustifiable but the left wasn't a friendly place to born-again pro-lifers like yours truly who are too skeptical about general human nature to believe that we can build a better tomorrow through greater bureaucracy and Kum-Ba-Yah.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

best of the blotter 33

COMPLAINT, DETROIT AVENUE: At 10:34 p.m. Friday, a man was seen staggering and drinking from a champagne bottle. When police caught up to him, they confiscated the bottle and determined it was sparkling grape juice. The man was advised and sent on his way.

HERE, YOU DEAL WITH HER!: A Bainbridge Road man forwarded his personal phone calls to the Bainbridge police station to avoid talking to his ex-girlfriend Feb. 17.

Police received three phone calls on the emergency line from an upset Brayton Trail woman trying to reach her former boyfriend. She told police she hoped to discuss their past relationship.

Police told the man to stop forwarding his phone calls to the station.

THERE’S NOT ENOUGH TOYS: Chagrin Falls police responded to a report of a boy, 5, who did not want to spend custody time with his father Feb. 27, only to learn the reason was his father didn’t have as many toys and games for him to play with at his house. The mother then allowed the boy to take some toys and games with him, police said.

PHONE MESSAGE, LANDER ROAD: Police received a call about 2:15 a.m. on Christmas from a woman wanting to know “why the Shell gas station was not answering the phone.”

SUSPICIOUS SITUATION, SPRAGUE ROAD: At 12:38 p.m. Dec. 21, a concerned citizen told police that two teenage boys wearing army fatigues were carrying a long silver pistol in a holster, and appeared to be heading toward Interstate 71.

Police located the boys, and spoke to one of their mother’s, who stated she knew they were out playing.

They were advised of their “very suspicious” appearance.

SUSPICIOUS PERSON, WILLIAMSBURG DRIVE: On Sunday, a caller reported a suspicious man walking weird on Williamsburg.

The caller felt the man was out of sorts and she was concerned about break-ins in the area.

Police responded and stopped a man on Sturbridge. The man was discovered to be a 16-year-old boy who was listening to music and dancing on his way to his home on Jefferson.

SUSPICION, LOCKLIE DRIVE: A caller reported on Dec. 14 that two juvenile boys were arguing in front of her home.

One of the boys walked up her driveway and said they wanted to sing Christmas carols. The resident denied the boys and they left in their vehicle. She told police there were 6-7 boys all together.

Police responded to the area and found vehicles on Medway, Tourelle and Longspur. All the boys checked okay and told police they would go home for the night.

SHOPLIFTING, SOUTHPARK MALL: Two juveniles were held for shoplifting at SouthPark Mall at 6:07 p.m. Thursday.

According to police reports, one of the juveniles had stolen a bottle of Tim McGraw cologne, valued at $33.40, from Sears.

The store chose not to press charges because the boys were returning home to Kuwait the next day. They were released to their mother.

THEFT, PEARL: Someone on Dec. 22 stole five frozen turkeys kept on a dock as gifts for employees of Value World, 6858 Pearl. The turkeys were among 41 the business operator bought as gifts.

CRIMINAL MISCHIEF, CHATMAN DRIVE: A woman told police at 4:29 p.m. Thursday that earlier in the day an unknown “husky” white male in his 30s had attached a gray scarf to the antenna of her vehicle while it was parked in a lot.

REPORTED DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, PEARL ROAD: A woman called police to report that a domestic dispute was going on at 12:39 a.m. Friday in the apartment unit above hers. It sounded as if someone were being thrown against the wall, she said.

Police went to the unit to find that the subjects’ bird had gotten out and was flying around, banging into things.

INFORMATION, NEWKIRK DRIVE: A resident reported that he had his snow blower and leaf blower chained on his porch and hidden under a blanket. At about 5:52 p.m. Dec. 13, the complainant stated that someone had removed the blanket and then put it back, in an apparent attempt to steal his property.

No footprints were observed at the site. The man has now set up a booby trap with wires and pop cans and told police he will call if anything comes up missing.

DAMAGE TO PROPERTY, NEWKIRK DRIVE: A woman said she woke up about 8 a.m. Friday to find that her picnic table was turned over and moved. Her gate and her neighbor’s gate were open. Her siding was damaged and covered in blood. The neighbor stated that her house “shook” at about 1 a.m. that morning.

Police responded, discovering that a deer committed the damage.

DO A LITTLE DANCE, KICK A LITTLE TRUCK . . . : A South Euclid man, 39, told police Feb. 15 his girlfriend got mad at him because he did not get up off the couch fast enough to move his truck from their driveway to suit her desire. He alleged the girlfriend, 41, kicked the truck several times, causing damage.

When police queried her, she denied kicking the vehicle. Instead, she said, her boyfriend must have mistaken a kicking action for her dancing alongside the truck.

DISTURBANCE, CHILLICOTHE ROAD: A BP convenience store employee called police after three suspicious males attempted to purchase alcoholic beverages Dec. 20.

One Huntsburg man, 21, appeared to have a legal ID. The employee described the males as Amish.

OVI/HIT-SKIP, U.S. ALT. 422:

Police received a call shortly before 9 p.m. last Friday from a witness reporting a “possible drunk driver, asleep behind the wheel” of his car at state routes 91 and 43. The witness followed the car, and reported it running the red light at SOM Center and Solon roads before getting onto westbound 422, at some point allegedly running a Ford Explorer off the road. Police located the suspect at the I-271 entrance ramp from 422, where his car was stopped and blocking traffic. He initially told police he was going to his sister’s house in Oakwood, which police noted was in the other direction. Although they did not detect the immediate presence of alcohol, the man was unsteady on his feet, had slurred speech and prescriptions in the car.

He also told police that “Ozzy Osborne and his music made me do it.” As police await lab test results, the suspect is charged with OVI, hit-skip, and failure to control, in addition to the previous breaking and entering charge.